ATTACK!

I've had him since he could fit on the palm of my hand. I got him after being seriously afraid of his kind. Yeah, deathly afraid. We never had them, only dogs and my mom instilled fear about them. She said they are evil and they can easily turn on you.

It's been three years now. I think four in April. We love and hate each other. He has shown me unconditional love and I truly love him in return. Sometimes though, when I see this awkward tail wag, I start getting insecure and start getting nervous around him, and he knows it.

Every night I have to drink a warm cup of milk, in my head that helps me get sleepy, see I tend to suffer from insomnia. Tonight was no different. I live in a one bedroom and my living room is divided by the kitchen counter. So, I went to the kitchen and washed my dishes and warmed my milk. I noticed that I put it on too high in the microwave, cause I could see the steam coming out of the cup. So, I turn off the kitchen light, and just had the reflection of the tv and start walking, cautiously with my cup of milk. As I round the corner of the counter, and get into the living room, he pounced at me, it was actually in slow motion, because I swore he was clawing at my calf, so I screamed like a bitch (I really hate admitting that) and try to grab at the cup as the milk spilled onto my chaise (I am very anal about my furniture) as he scampered from my scream, I'm positive I saw a smirk on his face. My heart was beating fast, I can't believe that little ass scared me. I cleaned up the mess and had a shit face.

About 10 minutes later he came out of the bedroom in an army crawl...just hesitant looking at me, all G.I. Joe like, of which, of course, I thought of a lion ready to pounce on his victim, again. So, I sat very still, pretending not to look at him, there he was inching closer, and closer, then I yelled: "ATTACK!" and this time he meowed like a bitch and ran underneath the bed. Thing about this is, I don't get satisfaction on getting him back...now I'm worried he'll "get me back" when I'm sleeping.